Leaving, cleaving, and becoming one flesh are important steps to intimacy in any marriage.
Though the word, "cleaving," means in part to "stick like glue," it does not mean that you will smother your spouse. In fact, cleaving will be balanced with giving freedom. When cleaving is properly balanced, the whole process wiii lead to space, trust, and belief.
Proper cleaving provides space for the partner to do interesting things in life. This space is given because of the great trust between the two individuals. Understanding that our wife or husband may have come into the marriage with some interests different from ours will lead toward allowing that person to continue to pursure his or her interests. Likewise, that person might be glad for the spouse to take enough interest to join in those activities, but he or she would also be wise not io insist on making the other try to engage in something that he or she really does not want to pursue.
If the husband plays a particular sport, the wife might allow him to continue to do so because she knows how much it means to him. He also may encourage his wife to continue to pursue some hobby, craft, or activity that he has no interest in learning himself.
When the partners pursue their separate interests, they also are able to gather "conversation pieces." If they spend all their time together, they will not have as much to talk about. However, when they spend some time in other areas, they will have "news" to give each other. This can only work to its best advantage when they trust each other enough to allow each to engage in some separate interests. They give space, but when they are together, they cleave to each other.
It is important to cleave without smothering. Frustration only comes to the partner who feels he or she is being smothered. Extreme possessiveness can hamper any relationship. When a person feels that he is being held too closely, he begins to experience a feeling of bondage. Perhaps the problem is often even greater for a wife sho is being held too closely. When she feels like she cannot make any decisions on her own, she does experience a great deal of frustration.
One of the things that is great about the United States of America is that we make the claim of being free. It seems that freedom, or the desire for it, resides in the human heart the world over. When a marriage does not have some degree of freedom that unmet desire will well up and lead to frustration, disappointment, and a feeling of bondage.
Proper cleaving grows trust. When a partner gives the other freedom without suspicion of that one being unfaithful, that allows the one given the freedom to have that basic need met. Although, predictability may possibly sometimes lead to some boredom, there is a great deal of satisfaction in knowing that you can predict that your partner will be faithful.
Knowing that you can trust your husband or wife, allows you to give that wonderful freedom he or she needs. The sentence, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder," has some merit. Of course, that could not be taken to the extreme either. A proper balance between cleaving and freedom gives space and trust.
The benefit of balanced cleaving also causes mates to believe in each other. Having someone to believe in you always brings encouragement. You may face some quite difficult tasks when you pursue some of your dreams. When those hard times come, you may be tempted to give up; but when you have someone who believes in you, you have the confidence to carry on.
When you cleave to your partner and give freedom, you help your mate to feel trusted. He or she, in turn, will likely feel that he or she can trust you. When that happens, you have the opportunity to support each other. You will support each other when pursuing the interests you share, and you will support each other in your separate interests.
Balanced cleaving gives space, develops trust, and causes each of you to believe in each other.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney. This article is an adaptation of a short excerpt from a chapter in Dr. Carney's forthcoming book: The LOVING Way to a Successful Marriage: Six Keys to Marital Bliss.
About the Author:
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for more than 30 years. The difficulty of achieving intimacy seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find these major steps to intimacy useful? For more articles like these, go to http://randysarticles.blogspot.com/. You also can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Articles on Marriage
Would you like to have an even more blissful relationship than you do now? If your marriage has deteriorated over the years, would you like to have some keys to help you to restore your relationship? The goal would not be to just get back to a tolerable situation, but to get to a great relationship! You can also make a good marriage great, and a great marriage even better!
Two resources can help:
The Loving Way to a Successful Marriage: Six Keys to Marital Bliss is one, and Secrets of Marital Bliss is another.
Don't just have a tolerable marriage, have a great marriage!
Two resources can help:
The Loving Way to a Successful Marriage: Six Keys to Marital Bliss is one, and Secrets of Marital Bliss is another.
Don't just have a tolerable marriage, have a great marriage!
Dr. Carney has been designated as an:
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Friday, May 30, 2008
Cleaving and Its Call to Commitment by Dr. Randy Carney
Leaving is a very important process in any marriage because it paves the way for cleaving. Cleaving means to "stick like glue." That does not mean the partners smother each other, but it does mean that they devote themselves to one another.
Cleaving does call for us to devote time to each other. That is one of our major commitments. We often speak of quality time and quantity time. Quality time is very important, but quantity time is also important. When the members of a couple love each other, they enjoy spending time with each other. Now, if the relationship has deteriorated, it may not be enjoyable like it once was, but if a couple wants to make improvements in their marriage after they have drifted apart, they will have to spend productive time with each other.
Cleaving not only has a call to commitment of time, it also has a call to commitment of sharing. Sharing involves sharing our possessions. It also involves the sharing of thoughts. How we respond when our mate shares his or her thoughts with us is quite important. Aside from sharing our thoughts, we need to share experiences. One person facetiously said that strong families had one thing in common. He said they all went camping together. Then he shared some of the humorous things that happened to them during that time. Usually, a camping experience will have something in it that does not go according to plan, but somehow, the family survives. He said they were drawn closer together because of it. Now, maybe you don't need to run out and buy some camping equipment, but you will need to share experiences as well as thoughts. Vacation times together can be very helpful in developing the experience of cleaving to each other.
Great benefits come to those who are able to share their dreams with each other. Doing this is a little fearful because our dreams (I'm speaking of dreams for the future, not what we see when our eyes close at night) are very private. Also, we are not sure that we are even able to come close to accomplishing those dreams. We are allowing ourselves to be vulnerable when we share our dreams. We are afraid, perhaps, that others may think our dreams are even silly. However, when we allow our partner to share his or her dreams with us, we do a great service when we take those dreams seriously and share some encouragement with them.
When dreams are shared, we have the opportunity to show support to our husband or wife. We also can grow closer because we simply believe in each other. Those dreams that seem insurmountable can be helped by a partner who will see at least a small part of that dream that can be accomplished. Then we could suggest that they consider maybe trying to accomplish that smaller task as a part of the larger dream.
A couples' relationship grows by spending time together, sharing our thoughts, and sharing our dreams. Our relationship grows even further when we take an even more vulnerable position by sharing our fears with each other. This is very difficult to do because we would often rather avoid our fears. However, when are able to share on this level, we move to deeper levels of cleaving to each other. When our spouse shares his or fears, we are in a position to give comfort. Just being able to share on such a level also removes a feeling of aloneness. We also are able to give support.
When we know our partner's fears, which we do not broadcast to others, we can understand how he or she may react to certain statements that others may make. We can even take steps, without others knowing what we are doing, to give encouragement and support during those times.
Cleaving has a call to commitment: especially in the areas of time and sharing. All positive efforts in those areas will yield benefits to partners in a marriage who wish to grow to even deeper levels of commitment. When we go in this direction, we begin to cleave to each other.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney, excerpted from a chapter in Dr. Carney's upcoming book, The LOVING Way to a Successful Marriage: Six Keys to Marital Bliss.)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for more than 30 years. The difficulty of achieving intimacy seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find these major steps to intimacy useful? For more articles like these, go to goarticles.com. You also can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Cleaving does call for us to devote time to each other. That is one of our major commitments. We often speak of quality time and quantity time. Quality time is very important, but quantity time is also important. When the members of a couple love each other, they enjoy spending time with each other. Now, if the relationship has deteriorated, it may not be enjoyable like it once was, but if a couple wants to make improvements in their marriage after they have drifted apart, they will have to spend productive time with each other.
Cleaving not only has a call to commitment of time, it also has a call to commitment of sharing. Sharing involves sharing our possessions. It also involves the sharing of thoughts. How we respond when our mate shares his or her thoughts with us is quite important. Aside from sharing our thoughts, we need to share experiences. One person facetiously said that strong families had one thing in common. He said they all went camping together. Then he shared some of the humorous things that happened to them during that time. Usually, a camping experience will have something in it that does not go according to plan, but somehow, the family survives. He said they were drawn closer together because of it. Now, maybe you don't need to run out and buy some camping equipment, but you will need to share experiences as well as thoughts. Vacation times together can be very helpful in developing the experience of cleaving to each other.
Great benefits come to those who are able to share their dreams with each other. Doing this is a little fearful because our dreams (I'm speaking of dreams for the future, not what we see when our eyes close at night) are very private. Also, we are not sure that we are even able to come close to accomplishing those dreams. We are allowing ourselves to be vulnerable when we share our dreams. We are afraid, perhaps, that others may think our dreams are even silly. However, when we allow our partner to share his or her dreams with us, we do a great service when we take those dreams seriously and share some encouragement with them.
When dreams are shared, we have the opportunity to show support to our husband or wife. We also can grow closer because we simply believe in each other. Those dreams that seem insurmountable can be helped by a partner who will see at least a small part of that dream that can be accomplished. Then we could suggest that they consider maybe trying to accomplish that smaller task as a part of the larger dream.
A couples' relationship grows by spending time together, sharing our thoughts, and sharing our dreams. Our relationship grows even further when we take an even more vulnerable position by sharing our fears with each other. This is very difficult to do because we would often rather avoid our fears. However, when are able to share on this level, we move to deeper levels of cleaving to each other. When our spouse shares his or fears, we are in a position to give comfort. Just being able to share on such a level also removes a feeling of aloneness. We also are able to give support.
When we know our partner's fears, which we do not broadcast to others, we can understand how he or she may react to certain statements that others may make. We can even take steps, without others knowing what we are doing, to give encouragement and support during those times.
Cleaving has a call to commitment: especially in the areas of time and sharing. All positive efforts in those areas will yield benefits to partners in a marriage who wish to grow to even deeper levels of commitment. When we go in this direction, we begin to cleave to each other.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney, excerpted from a chapter in Dr. Carney's upcoming book, The LOVING Way to a Successful Marriage: Six Keys to Marital Bliss.)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for more than 30 years. The difficulty of achieving intimacy seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find these major steps to intimacy useful? For more articles like these, go to goarticles.com. You also can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Monday, May 26, 2008
Leaving and Cleaving: Steps to Intimacy in Marriage by Dr. Randy Carney
(Originally published in GoArticles.com)
Leaving and cleaving are major steps to intimacy in any marriage. Most marital problems can be traced to either a failure to leave or to cleave. These words have their origin in the Bible. They are first mentioned in the Old Testament, and then repeated in the New Testament. Jesus, Himself, affirmed their importance. After leaving takes place, and cleaving begins, then intimacy, or "becoming one flesh" develops.
What does it mean to cleave to your husband or wife? Someone pointed out that a meat cleaver is used to slice things in two. That certainly is not the intended meaning as it relates to marriage. Instead, cleave means to "hold tightly." You might say that it means to "stick like glue!" Now, it does not mean smothering your spouse, but it does mean that a husband and wife will be totally devoted to each other. That is why the marriage vows often talk about being faithful until death.
How does cleaving come about? It does not happen simply by accident. Rather, it involves a conscious action of the will. Marriage intimacy does not develop just because of natural attraction, although the move toward intimacy may start because of such attraction; however, there will be times when one of the partners in the marriage will not be at his or her best. Indeed, there may also be times when neither of them are at their best. At those times, the natural attraction that they previously experienced will seem rather vague. Most marriages will also face hard times. It will take more than a "warm fuzzy feeling" to sustain the partners during those times of difficulty.
True love is often spelled c-o-m-m-i-t-m-e-n-t. That is what will carry a person through hard times. Cleaving is indeed a conscious action of the will.
Cleaving will be related to the step of leaving. When a person leaves his father and mother (and sometimes his former acquaintances or even some hobbies or former things that claimed time), he is able to give full attention to his wife. The same can be said for the wife who needs to devote time to her husband.
When a true leaving takes place, the couple will not be pulled in two or three different directions. They will attack their problems together. The husband will need to cut the apron strings and leave his mother. Likewise, the wife will have to transfer her reliance upon her "Daddy advisor" from her father to her husband.
This does not mean that the couple will never seek advice from either of their parents, but they will be doing so with the understanding that they are responsible for their own decisions within that marriage. Their former roles were to obey their parents. Their new roles are to consider what their parents have to say.
In order for true intimacy to develop in a marriage, there must be a "leaving" and a "cleaving." That then paves the way for becoming "one flesh" which indeed is true marital intimacy.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney--Condensed from a chapter in Dr. Carney's upcoming book: The LOVING Way to a Successful Marriage: Six Keys to Marital Bliss.)
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for more than 30 years. The difficulty of achieving intimacy seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find these major steps to intimacy useful? For more articles like these, go to http://randysarticles.blogspot.com/. You also can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Leaving and cleaving are major steps to intimacy in any marriage. Most marital problems can be traced to either a failure to leave or to cleave. These words have their origin in the Bible. They are first mentioned in the Old Testament, and then repeated in the New Testament. Jesus, Himself, affirmed their importance. After leaving takes place, and cleaving begins, then intimacy, or "becoming one flesh" develops.
What does it mean to cleave to your husband or wife? Someone pointed out that a meat cleaver is used to slice things in two. That certainly is not the intended meaning as it relates to marriage. Instead, cleave means to "hold tightly." You might say that it means to "stick like glue!" Now, it does not mean smothering your spouse, but it does mean that a husband and wife will be totally devoted to each other. That is why the marriage vows often talk about being faithful until death.
How does cleaving come about? It does not happen simply by accident. Rather, it involves a conscious action of the will. Marriage intimacy does not develop just because of natural attraction, although the move toward intimacy may start because of such attraction; however, there will be times when one of the partners in the marriage will not be at his or her best. Indeed, there may also be times when neither of them are at their best. At those times, the natural attraction that they previously experienced will seem rather vague. Most marriages will also face hard times. It will take more than a "warm fuzzy feeling" to sustain the partners during those times of difficulty.
True love is often spelled c-o-m-m-i-t-m-e-n-t. That is what will carry a person through hard times. Cleaving is indeed a conscious action of the will.
Cleaving will be related to the step of leaving. When a person leaves his father and mother (and sometimes his former acquaintances or even some hobbies or former things that claimed time), he is able to give full attention to his wife. The same can be said for the wife who needs to devote time to her husband.
When a true leaving takes place, the couple will not be pulled in two or three different directions. They will attack their problems together. The husband will need to cut the apron strings and leave his mother. Likewise, the wife will have to transfer her reliance upon her "Daddy advisor" from her father to her husband.
This does not mean that the couple will never seek advice from either of their parents, but they will be doing so with the understanding that they are responsible for their own decisions within that marriage. Their former roles were to obey their parents. Their new roles are to consider what their parents have to say.
In order for true intimacy to develop in a marriage, there must be a "leaving" and a "cleaving." That then paves the way for becoming "one flesh" which indeed is true marital intimacy.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney--Condensed from a chapter in Dr. Carney's upcoming book: The LOVING Way to a Successful Marriage: Six Keys to Marital Bliss.)
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for more than 30 years. The difficulty of achieving intimacy seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find these major steps to intimacy useful? For more articles like these, go to http://randysarticles.blogspot.com/. You also can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Understand How Your Spouse's Shape Affects Both of You by Dr. Randy Carney
Understand How Your Spouse's Shape Affects Both of You by Dr. Randy Carney
(Originally published in GoArticles.com)
Criticism is one of the most frustrating things a person has to face. Too much of it can tear a person down. On the other hand, criticism can be a very valuable thing. When a person listens to his critics, he is in a position to see where he has been misunderstood if the criticism is not valid. He may also see that someone is just taking shots at him unnecessarily. He may, however, recognize that there are some good points in the criticism and take steps to improve himself.
In a marriage, however, criticism is often devastating to the spouse unless it is handled very carefully. It is more likely that your spouse will need a feeling of acceptance than a feeling of criticism.
When you begin to focus on your spouse's strengths, you can encourage him to work toward greater accomplishments. Your spouse does have strengths, and sometimes those strengths are what drew you to him or her when you first met.
Understanding your partner is the greatest need that anyone has in a marriage. Sometimes it is very easy to misunderstand where someone is coming from. Christians who are married will perhaps understand talk of spiritual gifts. Others, while not familiar with the term spiritual gift, will understand that we all have inner motivations.
For those of you involved in Christian marriages, if you understand how different spiritual gifts motivate people, you will come a long way in improving relationships with your spouse.
When you gain such understanding, your patience will improve. Sometimes all that is needed to improve a relationship is an improved understanding of how spiritual gifts affect people. For instance, a person who has the gift of mercy will react to a situation differently from someone who has the gift of prophecy.
If you were in a crowded gathering at a restaurant or at a fellowship at church, and someone dropped or knocked over a glass of water, those with differing spiritual gifts would react in different ways. The prophet might say, "That's what happens when you are not careful." The teacher might say, "The reason it fell is that it was positioned in a dangerous way." The giver might say, "Here, let me buy you a new dessert." The server might say, "Oh, let me help clean that up." The ruler or administrator might say, "Susie, go get a paper towel. John, would you get the mop. I will refill the glass." Each one views the situation in a different way, but largely from the standpoint of his or her motivational gift.
Most people who have done extensive study on spiritual gifts say that there are at least two types of gifts: ministry gifts and motivational gifts. In regard to motivational gifts, they often say a person will have only one predominant motivational gift. The motivational gifts are referred to in I Corinthians 1:2-4. This word, translated gift, comes from the Greek word for Charisma Seven categories of motivational gifts are listed in Romans 12:6-8. The characteristics of these motivational gifts may not be evidenced full in how well a person does something, but they do express themselves in what motivates a person.
The other type of gift is a ministry gift. These same Bible teachers often say there are many ministry gifts, while an individual has only one motivational gift that stands out. Ministry gifts are special characteristics that allow a person to accomplish a needed task. The S in SHAPE stands for spiritual gift. (We are using the acronym that Rick Warren uses in his book, The Purpose-Driven Life, however he does not claim to be original in coining the term.) Trying to understand your spouse's motivational gift will help you deal with your Christian marriage.
Helping your mate is one of your greatest goals. One of the best ways to do that is to discover the heart or passion that drives your mate's life. When you are discovering your mate's shape, you find what his or her spiritual gift is. You also look for the heart passion he or she has.
Once you find that heart, you have the opportunity to encourage your mate to grow. Sometimes he or she may be given an opportunity for something outside of his or her comfort zone. If it is not something he or she has a passion for, you might encourage your mate to pass it by, but if it is something that person has a real heart for, you might encourage her to go ahead because she will only get better by trying. In each case their heart for the project should help them overcome their discomfort.
Just as the S in SHAPE stood for spiritual gifts, the H in SHAPE stands for heart motivations. When you understand these two areas, you will also know in what areas you will be able to give added support to your husband or wife. When they are working in their "heart-area," they will often be fulfilled, but their motivation may lead them into uncharted waters at times. Then, you will need to give encouragement.
We need understanding in the areas of spiritual gifts and heart motivations; but, beyond that we need to encourage our other half to use their God-given abilities. These abilities may have been acquired through skill and much practice.
Purpose is the most motivating force in the world. When people have purpose, they can endure all kinds of hardships. The A in SHAPE stands for abilities. When you encourage your spouse to use his abilities in God-given ways, he will feel a sense of purpose. Those abilities may have been natural or acquired abilities, but the important thing to do with any ability is to use it for God.
We are always encouraged when we can be involved in things that we do well. If you look at your wife's abilities, and encourage her to use them, that will help her self-esteem. Likewise, wives, if you encourage your husband in those things he does well and show respect for his skill, he will have a feeling of fulfillment.
Sometimes men experience what is called a mid-life crisis. Ladies are not exempt from that either, but men often feel that time is running out, or they are concerned about whether they have made a difference up to this point in life. Encouraging them to use their gifts and natural abilities to fulfill a God-given purpose will help them to overcome some lingering doubts that may develop into what is called a mid-life crisis.
The P in SHAPE stands for personality type. When you understand the characteristics of your spouses personality, you are able to give space when needed. If you have differing personalities, sometimes you will know not to take things personally when your spouse acts from his or her personality type.
Knowing that some types of personality are better suited for certain tasks, you will be able to divide up the responsibilities that exist in the marriage. For instance, if one spouse is very good with details, and the other is not, perhaps that spouse should be the one to take care of balancing the checkbook for the family.
Knowing and encouraging each other's strengths will help you to have a spirit of cooperation rather than antagonism as you work through the various tasks that are required in marriage.
Knowing each others bent will also allow you to participate in "give and take," and that knowledge will also allow you to "give each other some space."
Finally, the E in SHAPE stands for experiences. We all have a history. We have had good experiences, and what we have learned from those good experience can be used to help others along the way when they face similar experiences in their own lives. That is easy to understand. However, our painful experiences can also be used to help others. When someone is experiencing a particularly painful situation, someone who has been through a similar experience will be able to help them in a way that others cannot.
We do need to try to understand how a person's past experiences have shaped their personalities. Doing so will allow us to be patient in some areas that onlookers would not understand. On the other hand, just because a person has had a painful experience in the past, does not mean that they are not responsible for the decisions they make today. While we are sympathetic with our partner's past, we must also encourage them to live in the present and not allow their "victim mentality" to be an excuse for not behaving responsibility.
When we understand how our spouse's SHAPEs (Spiritual gifts, Heart, Abilities, Personality, and Experiences) affect both of us, we will go a long way toward improved communication and encouragement in our marriages.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney--Condensed from a chapter in Dr. Carney's upcoming book: The LOVING Way to a Successful Marriage: Six Keys to Marital Bliss.)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for more than 30 years. Understanding each other seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find those major steps to understanding useful? For more articles like these, go to http://randysarticles.blogspot.com/. You also can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
(Originally published in GoArticles.com)
Criticism is one of the most frustrating things a person has to face. Too much of it can tear a person down. On the other hand, criticism can be a very valuable thing. When a person listens to his critics, he is in a position to see where he has been misunderstood if the criticism is not valid. He may also see that someone is just taking shots at him unnecessarily. He may, however, recognize that there are some good points in the criticism and take steps to improve himself.
In a marriage, however, criticism is often devastating to the spouse unless it is handled very carefully. It is more likely that your spouse will need a feeling of acceptance than a feeling of criticism.
When you begin to focus on your spouse's strengths, you can encourage him to work toward greater accomplishments. Your spouse does have strengths, and sometimes those strengths are what drew you to him or her when you first met.
Understanding your partner is the greatest need that anyone has in a marriage. Sometimes it is very easy to misunderstand where someone is coming from. Christians who are married will perhaps understand talk of spiritual gifts. Others, while not familiar with the term spiritual gift, will understand that we all have inner motivations.
For those of you involved in Christian marriages, if you understand how different spiritual gifts motivate people, you will come a long way in improving relationships with your spouse.
When you gain such understanding, your patience will improve. Sometimes all that is needed to improve a relationship is an improved understanding of how spiritual gifts affect people. For instance, a person who has the gift of mercy will react to a situation differently from someone who has the gift of prophecy.
If you were in a crowded gathering at a restaurant or at a fellowship at church, and someone dropped or knocked over a glass of water, those with differing spiritual gifts would react in different ways. The prophet might say, "That's what happens when you are not careful." The teacher might say, "The reason it fell is that it was positioned in a dangerous way." The giver might say, "Here, let me buy you a new dessert." The server might say, "Oh, let me help clean that up." The ruler or administrator might say, "Susie, go get a paper towel. John, would you get the mop. I will refill the glass." Each one views the situation in a different way, but largely from the standpoint of his or her motivational gift.
Most people who have done extensive study on spiritual gifts say that there are at least two types of gifts: ministry gifts and motivational gifts. In regard to motivational gifts, they often say a person will have only one predominant motivational gift. The motivational gifts are referred to in I Corinthians 1:2-4. This word, translated gift, comes from the Greek word for Charisma Seven categories of motivational gifts are listed in Romans 12:6-8. The characteristics of these motivational gifts may not be evidenced full in how well a person does something, but they do express themselves in what motivates a person.
The other type of gift is a ministry gift. These same Bible teachers often say there are many ministry gifts, while an individual has only one motivational gift that stands out. Ministry gifts are special characteristics that allow a person to accomplish a needed task. The S in SHAPE stands for spiritual gift. (We are using the acronym that Rick Warren uses in his book, The Purpose-Driven Life, however he does not claim to be original in coining the term.) Trying to understand your spouse's motivational gift will help you deal with your Christian marriage.
Helping your mate is one of your greatest goals. One of the best ways to do that is to discover the heart or passion that drives your mate's life. When you are discovering your mate's shape, you find what his or her spiritual gift is. You also look for the heart passion he or she has.
Once you find that heart, you have the opportunity to encourage your mate to grow. Sometimes he or she may be given an opportunity for something outside of his or her comfort zone. If it is not something he or she has a passion for, you might encourage your mate to pass it by, but if it is something that person has a real heart for, you might encourage her to go ahead because she will only get better by trying. In each case their heart for the project should help them overcome their discomfort.
Just as the S in SHAPE stood for spiritual gifts, the H in SHAPE stands for heart motivations. When you understand these two areas, you will also know in what areas you will be able to give added support to your husband or wife. When they are working in their "heart-area," they will often be fulfilled, but their motivation may lead them into uncharted waters at times. Then, you will need to give encouragement.
We need understanding in the areas of spiritual gifts and heart motivations; but, beyond that we need to encourage our other half to use their God-given abilities. These abilities may have been acquired through skill and much practice.
Purpose is the most motivating force in the world. When people have purpose, they can endure all kinds of hardships. The A in SHAPE stands for abilities. When you encourage your spouse to use his abilities in God-given ways, he will feel a sense of purpose. Those abilities may have been natural or acquired abilities, but the important thing to do with any ability is to use it for God.
We are always encouraged when we can be involved in things that we do well. If you look at your wife's abilities, and encourage her to use them, that will help her self-esteem. Likewise, wives, if you encourage your husband in those things he does well and show respect for his skill, he will have a feeling of fulfillment.
Sometimes men experience what is called a mid-life crisis. Ladies are not exempt from that either, but men often feel that time is running out, or they are concerned about whether they have made a difference up to this point in life. Encouraging them to use their gifts and natural abilities to fulfill a God-given purpose will help them to overcome some lingering doubts that may develop into what is called a mid-life crisis.
The P in SHAPE stands for personality type. When you understand the characteristics of your spouses personality, you are able to give space when needed. If you have differing personalities, sometimes you will know not to take things personally when your spouse acts from his or her personality type.
Knowing that some types of personality are better suited for certain tasks, you will be able to divide up the responsibilities that exist in the marriage. For instance, if one spouse is very good with details, and the other is not, perhaps that spouse should be the one to take care of balancing the checkbook for the family.
Knowing and encouraging each other's strengths will help you to have a spirit of cooperation rather than antagonism as you work through the various tasks that are required in marriage.
Knowing each others bent will also allow you to participate in "give and take," and that knowledge will also allow you to "give each other some space."
Finally, the E in SHAPE stands for experiences. We all have a history. We have had good experiences, and what we have learned from those good experience can be used to help others along the way when they face similar experiences in their own lives. That is easy to understand. However, our painful experiences can also be used to help others. When someone is experiencing a particularly painful situation, someone who has been through a similar experience will be able to help them in a way that others cannot.
We do need to try to understand how a person's past experiences have shaped their personalities. Doing so will allow us to be patient in some areas that onlookers would not understand. On the other hand, just because a person has had a painful experience in the past, does not mean that they are not responsible for the decisions they make today. While we are sympathetic with our partner's past, we must also encourage them to live in the present and not allow their "victim mentality" to be an excuse for not behaving responsibility.
When we understand how our spouse's SHAPEs (Spiritual gifts, Heart, Abilities, Personality, and Experiences) affect both of us, we will go a long way toward improved communication and encouragement in our marriages.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney--Condensed from a chapter in Dr. Carney's upcoming book: The LOVING Way to a Successful Marriage: Six Keys to Marital Bliss.)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for more than 30 years. Understanding each other seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find those major steps to understanding useful? For more articles like these, go to http://randysarticles.blogspot.com/. You also can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Friday, May 16, 2008
After Marriage Compatibility Tests--Major Steps to Success by Dr. Randy Carney
After Marriage Compatibility Tests--Major Steps to Success by Dr. Randy Carney
(Originally published in GoArticles.com)
Marriage compatibility tests can be helpful to anyone thinking about getting married, or perhaps even more helpful for couples who are already married. However, what do you do after you get the results?
Several tests for compatibility can be found on the internet, but the real value to a couple is to know what to do when they get the results of the tests.
Problems in marriage are often related to several different areas: There may be a problem in the area of leaving. How do couples in blissful relationships deals with holidays and inlaws? One of the first keys that lead to marital bliss deal with process of leaving former relationships (the ties do not have to be severed completely, but they do have to be severed enough to give security to your partner.)
Another area or step for success relates to overcoming. Habits are hard to break, but the couple that learns to overcome some of the pull from the past will make major strides in their marriage relationship.
Another major step to success after a couple finds out their compatibility or incompatibility through testing is in the area of values. They must value each other, and they must have things in common that they share.
An additional major step to success comes when a couple discovers true intimacy. What items hinder their intimacy? They will work on learning all they can about each other. They will learn to forgive. They will also give each other pleasure in the area of physical intimacy.
Couples will also see the importance of meeting each other's needs. The husband has a need to be respected, and the wife has a need to feel loved. As one spouse meets the other's needs, the second partner is inspired to meet the needs of the first spouse.
Probably the most important step to take is to learn principles of giving. We learn to give to each other.
So, you can see steps that can be taken in six major areas, when a couple wants to improve their compatibility: *Leaving *Overcoming *Valuing *Intimacy gaining *Needs providing *Giving
Did you notice the first letter of each area, when put together with the others, spells, "Loving"?
There are many secrets to marital bliss. Author, Michael Webb has discovered at least a hundred, and most of those will display themselves in one of the areas mentioned above.
Take a marriage compatibility test? Yes, but make sure you take major steps to success after you get the results!
(Copyright 208 by Randy Carney)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. Understanding each other seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find those major steps to success useful? You can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
(Originally published in GoArticles.com)
Marriage compatibility tests can be helpful to anyone thinking about getting married, or perhaps even more helpful for couples who are already married. However, what do you do after you get the results?
Several tests for compatibility can be found on the internet, but the real value to a couple is to know what to do when they get the results of the tests.
Problems in marriage are often related to several different areas: There may be a problem in the area of leaving. How do couples in blissful relationships deals with holidays and inlaws? One of the first keys that lead to marital bliss deal with process of leaving former relationships (the ties do not have to be severed completely, but they do have to be severed enough to give security to your partner.)
Another area or step for success relates to overcoming. Habits are hard to break, but the couple that learns to overcome some of the pull from the past will make major strides in their marriage relationship.
Another major step to success after a couple finds out their compatibility or incompatibility through testing is in the area of values. They must value each other, and they must have things in common that they share.
An additional major step to success comes when a couple discovers true intimacy. What items hinder their intimacy? They will work on learning all they can about each other. They will learn to forgive. They will also give each other pleasure in the area of physical intimacy.
Couples will also see the importance of meeting each other's needs. The husband has a need to be respected, and the wife has a need to feel loved. As one spouse meets the other's needs, the second partner is inspired to meet the needs of the first spouse.
Probably the most important step to take is to learn principles of giving. We learn to give to each other.
So, you can see steps that can be taken in six major areas, when a couple wants to improve their compatibility: *Leaving *Overcoming *Valuing *Intimacy gaining *Needs providing *Giving
Did you notice the first letter of each area, when put together with the others, spells, "Loving"?
There are many secrets to marital bliss. Author, Michael Webb has discovered at least a hundred, and most of those will display themselves in one of the areas mentioned above.
Take a marriage compatibility test? Yes, but make sure you take major steps to success after you get the results!
(Copyright 208 by Randy Carney)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. Understanding each other seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find those major steps to success useful? You can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Your All-Important Marriage Certificate by Dr. Randy Carney
Your All-Important Marriage Certificate by Dr. Randy Carney
(Originally published in GoArticles.com)
How important is your marriage certificate? Though some would say it is just a piece of paper, it is actually far more than that.
It is a legal document. It shows that you have claims to each other's property, or perhaps, better, that what each of you have, you have in common.
It is also important to have a marriage certificate if one of the spouses dies. To insure that your husband or wife gets what you want them to have as far as material possessions go, the marriage certificate is all important.
To be sure, what makes the marriage strong is related to what the certificate represents. Deeper qualities, such as love and respect, are not reduced to pen and ink. On the other hand, a person who is not willing to put his or her commitment in writing may have very little or no commitment at all.
While our society today may be lax about who gets a room together, the marriage certificate was once a very important document for the newlyweds when they wanted to get a room to spend the night.
Today, we might do well to understand that the document represents a commitment to faithfulness to the marriage partner. It helps to alleviate the fear that this may be a here today; gone tomorrow relationship. One of the greatest fears one of the marriage partners may have may be related to the question: "Will he (or she) really stay with me?" Something about the paper document seems to seal the answer to that question in a greater way than the verbal words that seem to have a tendency to fade away. In fact they could be regarded as just a vapor that can fade into the oblivion of the memory of the one who might want to forget them.
So, when you consider marriage, don't forget the all-important marriage certificate.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. A lack of real commitment to each other seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find this article helpful? You can learn a lot more about further secrets to marital bliss by going to: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
(Originally published in GoArticles.com)
How important is your marriage certificate? Though some would say it is just a piece of paper, it is actually far more than that.
It is a legal document. It shows that you have claims to each other's property, or perhaps, better, that what each of you have, you have in common.
It is also important to have a marriage certificate if one of the spouses dies. To insure that your husband or wife gets what you want them to have as far as material possessions go, the marriage certificate is all important.
To be sure, what makes the marriage strong is related to what the certificate represents. Deeper qualities, such as love and respect, are not reduced to pen and ink. On the other hand, a person who is not willing to put his or her commitment in writing may have very little or no commitment at all.
While our society today may be lax about who gets a room together, the marriage certificate was once a very important document for the newlyweds when they wanted to get a room to spend the night.
Today, we might do well to understand that the document represents a commitment to faithfulness to the marriage partner. It helps to alleviate the fear that this may be a here today; gone tomorrow relationship. One of the greatest fears one of the marriage partners may have may be related to the question: "Will he (or she) really stay with me?" Something about the paper document seems to seal the answer to that question in a greater way than the verbal words that seem to have a tendency to fade away. In fact they could be regarded as just a vapor that can fade into the oblivion of the memory of the one who might want to forget them.
So, when you consider marriage, don't forget the all-important marriage certificate.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. A lack of real commitment to each other seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find this article helpful? You can learn a lot more about further secrets to marital bliss by going to: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Marriage Proposals and Common Sense by Dr. Randy Carney
Marriage Proposals and Common Sense by Dr. Randy Carney
(Originally published in GoArticles.com )
What are some common sense things to consider when getting ready to make a marriage proposal? First of all, you should be sure of your own commitment. Why do you want to make this proposal in the first place? It should certainly have to do with the fact that you love and respect the one you are going to ask to marry you in the first place.
Generally, your proposal should be in keeping with the importance of the occasion. It should not reflect a flippant attitude on your part. That is not to say that you could never use humor when getting ready to propose, but you had better be very sure that both of you already know the answer to the question before it is popped if you want to bathe the occasion in humor.
The same could be said for public proposals. If the one you are going to ask may be surprised by the proposal, it is certainly better to ask in private.
If you strongly suspect the proposal will be accepted, it may be appropriate to arrange some unusual public display of the question, but, really, it is only best to do something like this when you have discerned from the one you are going to ask that they are comfortable with such public presentations. Certainly, you should be very sure that the answer is known to both of you as yes,and that it really is just a matter of timing when the question is to be popped. This should be discerned before making a public display of the asking of one of the most important questions you will ever ask.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney)
About the Author:
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. He has found that exercising common sense (which sometimes has become clouded to the couple) brings success in any marriage. Did you find these common-sense ideas useful? You can learn a lot more secrets to marital bliss by going to: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
(Originally published in GoArticles.com )
What are some common sense things to consider when getting ready to make a marriage proposal? First of all, you should be sure of your own commitment. Why do you want to make this proposal in the first place? It should certainly have to do with the fact that you love and respect the one you are going to ask to marry you in the first place.
Generally, your proposal should be in keeping with the importance of the occasion. It should not reflect a flippant attitude on your part. That is not to say that you could never use humor when getting ready to propose, but you had better be very sure that both of you already know the answer to the question before it is popped if you want to bathe the occasion in humor.
The same could be said for public proposals. If the one you are going to ask may be surprised by the proposal, it is certainly better to ask in private.
If you strongly suspect the proposal will be accepted, it may be appropriate to arrange some unusual public display of the question, but, really, it is only best to do something like this when you have discerned from the one you are going to ask that they are comfortable with such public presentations. Certainly, you should be very sure that the answer is known to both of you as yes,and that it really is just a matter of timing when the question is to be popped. This should be discerned before making a public display of the asking of one of the most important questions you will ever ask.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney)
About the Author:
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. He has found that exercising common sense (which sometimes has become clouded to the couple) brings success in any marriage. Did you find these common-sense ideas useful? You can learn a lot more secrets to marital bliss by going to: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Love and Marriage Do Go Together Like a Horse and Carriage by Dr. Randy Carney
Love and Marriage Do Go Together Like a Horse and Carriage by Dr. Randy Carney
(Originally published in goarticles.com)
An old, old song says that love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage. In some countries, marriages are arranged ahead of time. This seems strange to those of us in the United States, but many arranged marriages do end up being happy marriages. What happens, even in those cases, is that the couple grows to love each other.
How do love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage? For a marriage to be at its best, love must certainly be a major component. Perhaps, though, it will be well to define the word, love. Love often seems to be related to some type of romantic attraction that perhaps is very explosive. Sometimes emotions and chemistry do produce those types of attractions, but it would be better to understand love as it relates to a longer look at a relationship. Love is far more than just an exciting time. Excitement cannot be generated forever. Indeed if the quality that generates excitement is the same day in and day out, it will become common-place and no longer generate excitement.
Love as related to marriage, while having romantic aspects, will better be related to the fact of caring for your husband or wife.
The husband who cares about his wife will strive to bring some romance into the marriage because he understands that is a great need of his wife.
The wife who cares about her husband will make efforts to help him feel respected and admired because that is one of his greatest needs.
Together, they will experience, love, respect, and romance. When that happens, love and marriage do go together like a horse and carriage.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. He has learned that love and respect brings success in any marriage. Did you find this article helpful? You can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
(Originally published in goarticles.com)
An old, old song says that love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage. In some countries, marriages are arranged ahead of time. This seems strange to those of us in the United States, but many arranged marriages do end up being happy marriages. What happens, even in those cases, is that the couple grows to love each other.
How do love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage? For a marriage to be at its best, love must certainly be a major component. Perhaps, though, it will be well to define the word, love. Love often seems to be related to some type of romantic attraction that perhaps is very explosive. Sometimes emotions and chemistry do produce those types of attractions, but it would be better to understand love as it relates to a longer look at a relationship. Love is far more than just an exciting time. Excitement cannot be generated forever. Indeed if the quality that generates excitement is the same day in and day out, it will become common-place and no longer generate excitement.
Love as related to marriage, while having romantic aspects, will better be related to the fact of caring for your husband or wife.
The husband who cares about his wife will strive to bring some romance into the marriage because he understands that is a great need of his wife.
The wife who cares about her husband will make efforts to help him feel respected and admired because that is one of his greatest needs.
Together, they will experience, love, respect, and romance. When that happens, love and marriage do go together like a horse and carriage.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. He has learned that love and respect brings success in any marriage. Did you find this article helpful? You can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Marriage Counseling: Why Would It Be Worth It? by Dr. Randy Carney
Marriage Counseling: Why Would It Be Worth It? by Dr. Randy Carney
Originally published in GoArticles.com
Why would a couple want to go to a marriage counselor?
Oftentimes, the husband will be reluctant to go because he feels that it reflects failure (and he feels that it reflects greatly upon his ability), and he does not like to admit failure. The wife can refuse for this reason also.
However, sometimes a couple can be helped by each of them listening to the other partner try to put into words the frustration he or she is having. When those words are directed at the third party instead of at each other, sometimes the other person hears things they never took time to hear before. Most marriage counselors do not want to just be referees, but even having rules for a discussion laid down and for which the spouses will be accountable can be helpful when it comes to working out the problems in the marriage. Then the counselor may require the couple to write down things they appreciate about each other. Sometimes this surprises the spouse of a partner who is not very verbal.
Just taking the time to go to a counselor, however, does show that the couple understands that their marriage is one of the most, if not the most, important area(s) of theirs lives. That may be worth as much, or more in some instances, as what they will hear from their counselor.
Is marriage counseling worth it? Yes, if the counselor is a good counselor. Yes, if the couple needs some help communicating. Yes, if it would remind them of why they came together in the first place. Certainly, the marriage relationship is worth anything that would help it.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. Understanding each other seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find this encouragement helpful? You can learn more secrets to marital bliss by going to: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Originally published in GoArticles.com
Why would a couple want to go to a marriage counselor?
Oftentimes, the husband will be reluctant to go because he feels that it reflects failure (and he feels that it reflects greatly upon his ability), and he does not like to admit failure. The wife can refuse for this reason also.
However, sometimes a couple can be helped by each of them listening to the other partner try to put into words the frustration he or she is having. When those words are directed at the third party instead of at each other, sometimes the other person hears things they never took time to hear before. Most marriage counselors do not want to just be referees, but even having rules for a discussion laid down and for which the spouses will be accountable can be helpful when it comes to working out the problems in the marriage. Then the counselor may require the couple to write down things they appreciate about each other. Sometimes this surprises the spouse of a partner who is not very verbal.
Just taking the time to go to a counselor, however, does show that the couple understands that their marriage is one of the most, if not the most, important area(s) of theirs lives. That may be worth as much, or more in some instances, as what they will hear from their counselor.
Is marriage counseling worth it? Yes, if the counselor is a good counselor. Yes, if the couple needs some help communicating. Yes, if it would remind them of why they came together in the first place. Certainly, the marriage relationship is worth anything that would help it.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney)
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. Understanding each other seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find this encouragement helpful? You can learn more secrets to marital bliss by going to: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Marriage Vows: The Key to Happiness by Dr. Randy Carney
Marriage Vows: The Key to Happiness by Dr. Randy Carney
(Originally published at GoArticles.com)
Could something as simple as mere words be the key to true happiness? Yes, and No. Yes, if the words express something deeper. No, if the words are only mouthed. Marriage vows that indicate true commitment can be the key to true happiness.
Is romantic love important? Of course. Is respect important? Of course. Is time spent together important? Yes. Is sharing important? Very important. Marriage vows that express true commitment bring true happiness. In fact, some would say that love is spelled c-o-m-m-i-t-m-e-n-t!
Vows that a couple write, if they choose to do, so should not be done in order to get away from the lasting commitment expressed in traditional marriage vows. Statements like "for as long as you both shall love," do not bring much security to a marriage partner.
When you have a marriage vow that expresses a lifetime commitment, and one that expresses the idea of giving all of your possessions to your partner, happiness comes when those vows are carried out. Pay attention to what you are going to say when you get married. If the vows express true commitment, then happiness will be yours, and your spouse's. However, this only comes about when both of you strive to carry out those vows with all of your heart.
(Copyright 2008 by Randy Carney)
For more articles like this one, go to GoArticles.com.
About the Author
Dr. Randy Carney has worked with married couples for years. Committing to each other seems to be a major hurdle that, if overcome, brings success in any marriage. Did you find those major steps to commitment useful? You can learn a lot more about how further secrets to marital bliss can help you here: Secrets of Marital Bliss.
Friday, May 9, 2008
The Childhood of Jesus
We don't seem to know very much about the childhood of Jesus.
I have always been intrigued by the thought that there were other children in the family. How often is the second child challenged and frustrated by trying to measure up to an older sibling? The other children in the lineup also face this situation. Perhaps they hear, "Why can't you be like your brother (or sister)?"
Just think what it would be like, however, to have a perfect older brother. That would be one you really could not measure up to. I'm sure the sinful nature of His brothers kept them from really seeing that Jesus was indeed as good as he really was. It took something earth shaking (Well, there was an earthquake at the time of the crucifixion, wasn't there?) to bring them to the realization of the truth. The fact of the Resurrection impacted them all, just like it does all the rest of us who have become believers throughout history.
Just think about it. Jesus was subject unto his parents. He was subject unto them even though He knew more than they did. He was subject unto them even though they were sinful (and He was not!).
What thoughts and insights do you have concerning the childhood of Jesus? Please post your comments under the "Week 3 Posts" entry in the Preachers Meeting blog.
Wow! This was free. It was a post for another blog called "Preachers Meeting." It got put here first by mistake. However, If you are interested in more comments like ths one, go to preachersmeeting.blogspot.com.
I have always been intrigued by the thought that there were other children in the family. How often is the second child challenged and frustrated by trying to measure up to an older sibling? The other children in the lineup also face this situation. Perhaps they hear, "Why can't you be like your brother (or sister)?"
Just think what it would be like, however, to have a perfect older brother. That would be one you really could not measure up to. I'm sure the sinful nature of His brothers kept them from really seeing that Jesus was indeed as good as he really was. It took something earth shaking (Well, there was an earthquake at the time of the crucifixion, wasn't there?) to bring them to the realization of the truth. The fact of the Resurrection impacted them all, just like it does all the rest of us who have become believers throughout history.
Just think about it. Jesus was subject unto his parents. He was subject unto them even though He knew more than they did. He was subject unto them even though they were sinful (and He was not!).
What thoughts and insights do you have concerning the childhood of Jesus? Please post your comments under the "Week 3 Posts" entry in the Preachers Meeting blog.
Wow! This was free. It was a post for another blog called "Preachers Meeting." It got put here first by mistake. However, If you are interested in more comments like ths one, go to preachersmeeting.blogspot.com.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Hello and Welcome to Randy's Articles
This is my second blog. I just launched one a few weeks ago for a group that meets for discussion and encouragement in our local area.
This site will be a central place to learn about articles I am posting on the web. They will be on a wide range of topics. I have a friend who says, "Come back often. We'll treat you so many different ways, you are bound to like one of them!" Well, we'll cover so many different topics that your are bound to like some of them--hopefully almost all of them.
Some of the first ones we will highlight offer encouragement and insight to improving each of our marriages. We will, however, look at topics like "Self-removal of moles," and "How to Run Your Car on Water"! So, come by often. You're bound to like some of them.
This site will be a central place to learn about articles I am posting on the web. They will be on a wide range of topics. I have a friend who says, "Come back often. We'll treat you so many different ways, you are bound to like one of them!" Well, we'll cover so many different topics that your are bound to like some of them--hopefully almost all of them.
Some of the first ones we will highlight offer encouragement and insight to improving each of our marriages. We will, however, look at topics like "Self-removal of moles," and "How to Run Your Car on Water"! So, come by often. You're bound to like some of them.
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